Slow Down

I am reminded again that it really is the little things that mean so much.
That truly make your heart swell.
The little things.
I’m always so busy.
Constantly on the go.
That’s usually a good thing.
It means my life is full.
My business is thriving.
I’m working out or spending quality time with friends or family.
My kids are active.
This week was no exception.
Crazy busy, but when you’re in a funk or feeling blah it’s a major challenge to get yourself moving.
Major.
When you have three little people depending on you though, you make it happen.
You drag yourself out of bed at the last possible moment, take yourself to your 9-5, drag yourself to whatever you have that evening then drag yourself back home to start the nightly routine.
You don’t feel fulfilled.
No matter what, you just don’t.
It’s because you’re sad.
Your depressed.
Being sad or depressed literally hurts.
Your body aches.
If it weren’t for the kids there’s times I would probably curl up in a ball and just not move.
Thank God I can’t do that.
I have people depending on me.

So this week I decided to just say no to anything or anyone that needed me one night.
I decided I would come home, make dinner, we would all sit down together to eat it and then we would start some of our favorite Easter activities.
After that we laid down to watch a movie.
I snuggled with the three loves of my life.
I got this best nights sleep in awhile.
Just stopping for a few hours, no running around, made such a difference in how I felt.
Nothing has changed.
Nothing is better.
I’m still a disaster.
But my heart is full.
I was able to focus on the important stuff.
I can’t control everything, I can’t make it get any better or any easier for anyone right now.
But I can make sure they have a nice night.
Laughing and relaxing, eating and picture taking.
I can make sure they know how much I love them.
I can control that.
No matter where we live or what we get to do, there’s love.
Lots of it.
That makes me happy.
That makes me smile.
The rest will work out how it may.
God gave me these kids and I am so thankful.
So blessed to be their mommy.
Even at my darkest, hardest, most difficult moments I can be strong for them because they give me strength.
We’ll be ok.
Help or not.
Whatever.
It is what it is.
We have this.
Together we will make it.

-S

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